Interracial couples can experience many unique challenges. One of them might be learning how to honor your partner and their culture during the holidays. In the U.S., there are many holidays celebrated in different cultures and religions. Your partner might celebrate a different holiday than you or the same holiday as you but in a different way.
You may be feeling overwhelmed and anxious about how to incorporate their holiday traditions. That is very normal. It might take some extra effort to understand your significant other’s culture and background, but it can be rewarding getting to celebrate them for who they are and their traditions.
Celebrating the holidays as an interracial couple
Ask Questions
Interracial couples can experience many unique challenges. One of them might be learning how to honor your partner and their culture during the holidays. In the U.S., there are many holidays celebrated in different cultures and religions. Your partner might celebrate a different holiday than you or the same holiday as you but in a different way.
You may be feeling overwhelmed and anxious about how to incorporate their holiday traditions. That is very normal. It might take some extra effort to understand your significant other’s culture and background, but it can be rewarding getting to celebrate them for who they are and their traditions.
Be Creative
Small, creative acts can go a long way in making your partner feel seen and celebrated. There are many things you can do to honor your partner’s culture. One of Neema's wonderful counselors, Fabian Armenta, is Latino and his wife is White. They have made a fun tradition for the holidays of always including dishes from both of their cultures. He believes it is a great way to incorporate both of their cultures into the holidays while also creating new traditions. He noted that his wife is thoughtful to honor and celebrate his Latino culture. One year, she bought their kids Christmas books in Spanish. This made him feel validated and celebrated for his heritage. Consider small acts that you could do to make your partner feel validated and celebrated.
Visiting Your Interracial Partner’s Family
Visiting your partner's family for the holidays can be stressful and overwhelming. Those feelings can be intensified if your partner is a different race or from a different culture. You might be the only person of your race in the room. Or, you might be the only one who does not speak their language. It is natural that you might feel uncomfortable or out of place.
First, acknowledge the situation. Acknowledge how you feel and that this is a new situation for you. As difficult as this experience might be, it can be a growing experience for you. There are many people in America who experience that same feeling on a daily basis in every room they are in, not just for a family dinner. Remembering this can help to grow your empathy for people.
Once you acknowledge your reality, accept it. Accept that you might be the only person of your race in the room. Or that you don't understand the language being spoken. And that is okay. Once you accept the situation and know it is okay to feel how you are feeling, then you can work towards making the best of the situation.
As discussed above, be curious. Ask questions about their culture and traditions. People usually love to share about their culture and what it means to them.
How Christianity Can Support Interracial Couples
Christian counseling can provide invaluable support for interracial couples by helping them build a Christ-centered foundation for their relationship. Here are some ways faith can help:
1. Unity in Christ
Christianity teaches that all people are created in God's image. Galatians 3:28 reminds us, "There is neither Jew nor Greek, slave nor free, male nor female, for you are all one in Christ Jesus." This principle encourages couples to prioritize their faith above cultural differences.
2. Grace and Understanding
Navigating an interracial relationship requires grace, patience, and understanding. The Bible teaches us to love one another as Christ loves us, which includes listening to each other's experiences and being open to growth and change.
3. Christian Marriage Counseling
Marriage counseling from a Christian perspective can help interracial couples work through cultural challenges while strengthening their bond. Whether addressing family dynamics, communication barriers, or future parenting concerns, Christian counseling provides support to integrate biblical principles to navigate these challenges.
4. Building a Strong Foundation
Through prayer, attending church together, and seeking mentorship from other Christian couples, interracial partners can build a strong, faith-based foundation that will sustain their relationship long-term.
Seeking Professional Support
If you find the holidays consistently overwhelming, consider working with a counselor. Couples counseling and marriage counseling can help interracial couples understand each other better and build strong relationships rooted in love and respect. If in-person sessions are not feasible, online counseling provides a flexible alternative.
Therapy for Racial Identity Challenges
Neema Counseling is located in Austin, Texas, and we have many skilled therapists who are knowledgeable about the challenges individuals face related to culture and race. If you are having trouble navigating an interracial relationship, we are here for you. If you are multiracial and working through embracing all parts of you or feeling fully accepted, we can help you work through that as well. Our therapists are ready to have difficult conversations and help you to thrive in your relationships and identity. To begin this journey, schedule a free consultation here.